Thursday, March 18, 2010

Three Days

That's how long it took TKDTS to figure out that GL wasn't playing with them. Yesterday afternoon, Mama Bear and GL were out in the yard when the youngest of TKDTS came by and asked if he could come play. MB said no. He was shocked and asked why. When she said, "Because you threw him in the water," he said he didn't do it, it was his older brothers. MB said that didn't matter, GL was not coming over to play. A few minutes later, his mother came up the walk to debate the matter. I took GL inside, because he was yelling, "I have to play with my friends!"

Mama Bear talked to TKDTS' mother. She insisted that it wasn't her kids that threw him in the water, it was some other kids who were visiting. She also denied the penis threat. Funny, there was no penis-cutting talk until they moved into the neighborhood, and we've met other relatives of this family who say that's pretty typical of how the boys talk when their mother's not around. When she's around, they pretend to be little angels. They don't have to keep it up for long, because she rarely comes outside, and then only to the driveway to watch the toddlers she babysits. Her kids, meanwhile, even the six year old, are running all over town long after dark.

The mother wouldn't quit arguing, so MB finally said, "It doesn't matter. We're taking a break." She didn't mention that the break is permanent. I've been told that he needs to learn how to deal with these situations by experience. Excuse me, one of the main traits of autism is an inability to pick up on social cues. That's like throwing a quadraplegic into shark-infested waters and hoping he'll learn to swim. GL keeps insisting he needs to go play with TKDTS "because they're my friends." He obviously isn't learning from this experience. We need to think of his safety.

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Blogger Arby said...

Exactly why does this mother care so much that GL plays with her children? What’s there to argue about? If another parent tells me that my children cannot play with her children, my answer is, “Okay.” Is this some sort of personal insult that not everyone thinks her children are perfect angels? If she knew that “other children” threw GL in the water, why didn’t she stop and/or reprimand the other children? Is it acceptable to her that this happened? Other people’s children. They’re problems because of the other people!

March 18, 2010 at 1:34 PM  
Blogger Brownie said...

I'm so glad we live in the country - no neighbors to play with.

March 18, 2010 at 2:45 PM  

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