Sunday, March 14, 2010

The Kids down the Street

The kids down the street have been an ongoing problem. GL doesn't recognize when people are mistreating him, taking advantage of him, telling him to do wrong, or letting him take the fall. If they tell him they are his friends, he believes them without question, despite all evidence to the contrary, and defends them when others, even those closest to him, question their loyalty. BB recognizes when they are taking advantage of GL, and warns and protects him as best an 11 year old can, but GL insists on playing with TKDTS all the time, and BB can't always be there, and would rather not play with them at all because they are unpleasant people.

They order GL around, give his autographed football to their dog to chew on, dare him to do things he can't or shouldn't do, teach him to swear and call people "idiot" "moron" and "retard", trip him and laugh when he falls, mock him and call him names, and he keeps coming back like an abused puppy, hoping that maybe, this time, his "friends" will give him some hint of belonging. In response, they refuse to play with him, run away when they see him coming, insist on playing beyond the boundaries of where he is allowed to go on his own, make him the butt of their jokes, find new ways to torment him for their own amusement, and threaten to cut off his penis.

Almost the entire winter's snowfall melted this week. (We've had only a few partial thaws all winter. It's been up to nearly 50 degrees every day.) Then it rained several days in a row. TKDTS now have a lake in their back yard. It's one of those low-lying areas I mentioned. We don't live on a hill, we actually live in a valley, but it's a valley with someplace to drain to. Almost no puddles in our yard, and not a hint of water in our basement. GL insisted on going to play with them this afternoon. He came back soaked to the neck. His winter coat, shirt, pants, and socks were saturated with mud. His shoes squished out water when he walked. First he said TKDTS pushed him in. Then, sensing that I might be displeased with them, insisted that they hadn't because "they're my friends." But he had no other explanation of how he got wet.

He wanted to go right back out and play with them. I insisted on a dry change of clothes. Maybe he had fallen in accidentally. Maybe, but I doubted it. As soon as he was changed he insisted on going back. His shoes were too wet to wear, and he only has one pair, so I compromised, and let him wear his boots. He ran back to their yard, and they pushed him in again. He came back and told me, but insisted on going back. I wouldn't let him. I closed the door. He began pounding on the glass, trying to get out. I managed to distract him with a new DVD, a present I'd been keeping in reserve. I told him he had to take a bath before he could watch it. He reluctantly got in the tub. After his bath and DVD, I distracted him with a computer game until evening. Then he decided it was time to go back and play with them. I said no. He started screaming and pounding on the walls, then hit a window and said he was going to break it to get out. I gave him his meds and put him to bed early.

I have no intention of letting him go to their house to play again. I haven't decided whether I'll let them play over here if they want to--they haven't been to interested in that lately, anyway.

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Blogger Brownie said...

What a painful experience for you both!

March 15, 2010 at 7:07 PM  
Blogger Oklahoma Granny said...

I've just found my way here through Arby. I'm going to have to start reading through your archives because I want to know where the parents of TKDTS are.

March 18, 2010 at 9:03 AM  

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